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Helping Children and Teens Dealing with Divorce
Do:
- Work together with other parent to set a parenting plan that works for your child.
- Encourage a healthy relationship with the other parent. Help them to be ready on-time with all necessary supplies.
- Share basic information about how things will change and the impact on them. Be honest, direct and simple.
- Present the divorce to the child together, if possible.
- Assure your child that he is not to blame for the divorce and they can’t fix it.
- Allow time to adjust to family change.
- Be consistent with discipline. Children need limits, boundaries and consequences.
- Reassure child that you are both committed to parenting and loving him.
- Expect for transitions to be a time of adjustment and possibly behavioral issues.
- Speak courteously about the other parent.
- Support your child emotionally, physically and financially.
- Set a weekly schedule that promotes routine, stability and flexibility.
- Listen and address your child’s fears and concerns.
- Offer counseling as an opportunity for the child to explore their feelings and help them with transitions.
- Ask for help if you need it-the better you adjust, the better your child will adjust.
- Speak unkindly about other parent. The child loves both of you and doesn’t want to take sides.
- Share parental concerns with child (loneliness, financial concerns, relationship issues, cause of divorce)
- Encourage child to side with one parent against the other.
- Argue with the other parent in front of the child.
- Buy your child rewards out of guilt, instead, commit to spending time and take an interest in him.